I LOVE this.

“They have no concept of being ‘fat’ or ‘thin’. Too big or too small. They just know the importance of eating do that their brains and little bodies can grow”

You are such a kind, selfless soul claire! I love everything you do. I’ve never met you but I can tell you are a good person. Inside-out. I will forever remember this quote. Thank you.

Thank you for using your platform to make other mothers feel less isolated in their own journeys ❤️

Hello! I’m so thankful for your writing as it is exactly what is in my brain. I’m 12 weeks along with my second and I hate that I hate being pregnant. I’ve lost so much of who I am/was with my first pregnancy and so far with the second. Hearing that I’m not the only one truly helps me feel like I’m part of a community of strong women.

Girl these are ALL valid feelings!!!!! All I’m gonna say is give yourself a little grace. Hang in there mama!!!!

You’re doing great, Claire. I’m totally with you on this- had recently become super healthy, nearing my health and weight goals (probably why I finally got pregnant with my third after trying for a year and a half), and now I’m 6 weeks pregnant and seeing my healthy new habits unravel with nausea, exhaustion and cravings. I feel so lucky to have become pregnant- I actually had a fertility appointment booked for next month that I still need to cancel. And I have close friends who are having a much more difficult fertility journey than I’ve had. But the way that pregnancy completely takes the reigns of our lives is challenging for someone who craves some semblance of order… or is proud of the order she’s achieved in the chaos of normal life outside of pregnancy. We need to give ourselves grace, yes, but thanks for acknowledging how difficult that can be despite our luck/blessings/whatever you want to attribute the good fortune to. I don’t want you to have a hard time giving yourself grace, but I am made more content knowing I’m not alone in the challenge.

Thank you for sharing Claire, and so eloquently said. I felt the exact same when pregnant with my two kids (2 year old and 3 month old – I’m 37 and a fellow Brisbane-ite). What we put ourselves through mentally and physically is so extreme. I’m a retired track and field athlete, so fitness and performance is all I’ve ever known since I was 7. So I hear you with the ‘ I used to be able to run 13 miles’ and now I’m a couch potato.
Pregnancy and postpartum is incredibly difficult no matter your situation. It’s almost like we are meant to lose ourselves through this period, forget what and who we were, to survive and give in to the nature of pregnancy, birth, feeding a baby, sleep deprivation, and the list goes on. It’s survival. You find yourself in the haze somewhere on the other side, and come alive again. In the mean time, complain, feel rubbish, yell, cry, bounce back, and do it all again. You’re allowed. X

I loved reading this. It gave me some peace. I’m 32 weeks along and the struggle is real. No one ever wants to talk about how hard pregnancy can be – mentally and physically.

Oh Claire, THIS! All of this! I am also on baby #3, at 39 years old and in my final trimester (29 weeks). This pregnancy has been by far the healthiest but I have also gained the most weight and been the most debilitating on my body…trying to stay positive as well as I watch my body stretch to dimensions I’m not sure I’m totally comfortable with. As beautiful as this journey is, I too struggle with all kinds of feelings and look forward to the day I hold my baby (girl) and have left my last pregnancy behind and can focus on me and ny health again. Sending all the positive momma vibes your way. Thank you for sharing and making this fellow preggo’s feelings feel very validated. ♥️

I’m currently 17 weeks with my third and I know exactly how you’re feeling. A roller coaster of emotions. I feel like a lot of time I’m just on the verge of tears. I have the same worries as you too and some moments it’s hard to find the good and positives.

Right now the only thing that truly helps is being outside and be with my kids. I think this is our last as well and I keep beating myself up about how I’m not making the best of it, but damn, being pregnant is hard and I forget about that each time haha! I know my future self will wish I would have been easier on myself.

I also tell myself, I deserve to be happy and if I gain 20 lbs then I guess that’s what the baby needs to be healthy. And after baby is here, do what is needed for me to be healthy. I noticed the second trimester I’ve started old habits of snacks which is daunting. But each time I say, oh, I guess baby needs calcium for her bones (as I pour a bowl of cereal) lol

Anyway! From all the way in Pennsylvania, this mama knows what you’re going through everyday. At least motherhood.

It’s hard. It’s challenging. It makes me want to cry and laugh. But looking back at my younger self I was so missing out on this and it makes me feel so grateful and so so lucky as I know this life could be so different.

Best of luck ❤️❤️

Thank you so much for sharing… so many people expect you to be a walking ray of sunshine and “glowing” when your pregnant and be grateful you have not got HG or you are even pregnant, this is my first pregnancy and I felt so guilty for feeling the same way! It helps to know other mums feel like this sometimes too x

Thank you for this. 🙏 It brought me to tears to read somebody else’s thoughts, feelings, and emotions that so closely mirror my own. I’m 36, and currently 32 weeks pregnant with my third (and also likely last child). After two very easy pregnancies during which I felt genuinely great and “bounced back” fairly quickly from, I’m finding this pregnancy to be a roller coaster, both physically and emotionally. My feelings of guilt, anxiety, and inadequacy seem insurmountable most days, and all my usual tricks to pull myself out of my funk don’t seem to be working. I also have a history of disordered eating and am struggling with body image issues that I had thought were long ago left in the dust. I’m grateful for your willingness to be so open about your feelings and difficulties, it’s nice to know I’m not alone.

Currently 24 almost 25 weeks with my third and probably last pregnancy too, same pace of weight gain and literally SAME exact feelings in every aspect you talked about – so hard but also really helps to know I’m not alone because some days I feel like my mind is so INSANE there’s no way it’s normal and there has to be something wrong with me. Thank you for sharing!!

I am 31 weeks weeks pregnant and these are my feelings almost verbatim. Thank you for acknowledging them and being so truthful and honest. It’s so hard to be that honest and your post resonated with me a lot. Thank you! -Monica

Someone will always have it worse than you do. As someone who also struggles with guilt, it can be completely invalidating to your feelings to have someone tell you “you should be grateful because someone else has XYZ.” Or “someone else would love to be able to XYZ…” Yeah, maybe that’s true. But it is also true that you’re allowed to feel whatever you feel because your feelings are just as valid. Just a thought from a random internet stranger!

(Also, I love my three children. I hated being pregnant. I struggled watching the numbers climb. I struggled not being able to do what I used to do. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with saying it’s not all sunshine and rainbows. It doesn’t mean you don’t love your kids or you’re less of a mom.)

I can’t thank you enough for sharing this Claire. I am pregnant with our second and am feeling EXACTLY as you are and it’s so comforting to hear I’m not alone.

I’ve been feeling so guilty this time around for not being as “positive” and “excited” as the first. Yes, is has been comforting knowing how the process goes and the incredible love you get to experience in the end but it’s also been SO much harder mentally and physically for me. The knowing almost feels like a punishment this time. I find myself wishing I could be blissfully unaware again. I feel like I have set this pregnancy “benchmark” and I find myself constantly comparing myself to “last pregnancy”. All the physical activities I did, the amount of weight I gained, how I looked, how I felt and it’s mentally exhausting and defeating.

Pregnancy for me is not this magical, blissful experience. I wish it was but if I’m being truly honest, it’s not. I am a former D1 athlete and also recently completed my first marathon and what I realized through reading your post is that it’s also is a huge part of who I am and my identity. So being pregnant and not having control over my body, the weight gain, the limits in my normal physical activities makes me feel less than, weak and so far from myself. I struggled with this during my first pregnancy but this time it feels much more challenging.

I know I am incredibly blessed to be pregnant and I know in the end all these feelings will get erased once I get to meet our sweet little babe. But until then, it’s posts like this that make me feeling less alone. So thank you, from the bottom of my heart for sharing.

XO, Sam

P.s. Vampire Diaries for life <3

You make me feel seen and validated, so thank you! I felt all those same things during pregnancy, you are not alone.