9:30 a.m

I always feel like a lazy sack of shite when I sleep this late. Doesn’t matter that I have no kids, am jet lagged, and stayed up until 2:30am - any wake up after 7:00am means I’m a degenerate. I should probably unpack that in therapy. I throw on sweats (note to self: you’re in Cannes goddamit put in some effort) and run downstairs for breakfast. I’ve got my buffet haul on lock - 3 pieces of bread, scrambled eggs, 1lb of butter, yoghurt, a plate of fruit, and a latte. Sounds like a lot but you’d be surprised how hard it is to get a good meal in this town. Thrilled that I can enjoy coffee again after 8 weeks of being disgusted by it. I go over the schedule with my friend and stylist, Amarsana. Everyone seems kind of stressed but I’m in a food coma so nothing bothers me. I roll myself back to my room to digest a little before throwing on my workout gear and heading to the gym.

12:30 p.m.

I head back up to my room through the swarm of people scrambling with garment bags. We still haven’t totally locked in my look for the day but Amarsana is the GOAT so I’m not stressed about it. I’ve got about 2 hrs before I have to start getting ready so I handle my emails/life admin and spend an hour reading. I haven’t read a book in months - mainly because I’m asleep 30 seconds after my head touches the pillow at night - but since I’m footloose and fancy (child-free) I let myself indulge. I love Colleen Hoover books and am desperate to finish It Starts With Us, since the prequel It Ends With Us is one of my favorites. I’m well and truly relaxed when it’s time to start getting ready. Yes, it makes me feel guilty. Yes, I know it’s stupid but I can’t help it. Another thing to unpack I guess. 

5:45pm

There are hundreds of people in the lobby and I’m surrounded by a sea of beautiful models. “WTF am I doing here”, I think to myself for the millionth time on this trip. After spending weeks looking like the bottom of a shoe, it’s strange trying to fit in with this crowd. I give myself a little pep talk and jump in the car, which takes about 30 mins to go half a mile. This gives me some time to compose myself since I always get super anxious heading to these things. I feel like an imposter. As if someone’s going to stop me at security and say “oh sorry there’s been a terrible mistake, no one wants to see you, ya big LOSER”. I meditate a little, try to FaceTime my kids but get iced, and finally we arrive. It’s crazy busy on the carpet which is a little overwhelming but I keep reminding myself how lucky I am to be here. I do my best to pose with my new appendage, make my way up the stairs and the frantic part is done.